Male tyrant: signs that his wife to do?
Many women living with their husbands do not always immediately notice the tyrannical manifestations in the character of their spouse. Most often this happens when, having lived together for several years, the veil of love falls from his wife's eyes, and she begins to notice that her man is far from perfect as she seemed at first. How to recognize the first signs of a complex nature, and whether you should put up with it, you will learn from our article.
The tendency to tyranny manifests itself in different ways, for someone it is periodical, and for some of the men it has a full set of qualities that characterize him as an authoritative and despotic person.
- Excessive control over the life of his wife. Without the permission of the husband can not step and step. A woman reports for the slightest delay and all the extra expenses.
- The husband spreads his arms. Solving conflicts by peaceful means has not been used in such a family for a long time. If a man did not like something very much, he raises his hand to a woman and considers it the norm.
- Psychological attack.The husband constantly presses his authority. Any decisions contrary to his opinion are suppressed. The wife does not have the right to make choices in important matters.
- A man speaks negatively about those around his wife and limits her communication with relatives and friends.
- He constantly openly humiliates or allegedly makes fun of his wife’s shortcomings.
What if the husband began to show signs of a tyrant?
It is important for a woman to understand that if a man began to behave in this way, then he is unlikely to change, and most likely this is a temper of character, and not a minute clouding. Therefore, it is impossible to “cure” a husband, let alone rehabilitate him. It is also worth remembering that tyrants are excellent manipulators. And as soon as a woman makes a firm decision to leave such a husband or temporarily end the relationship, he immediately becomes docile and ready for all her conditions. Such behavior knocks a woman out of the rut and makes you think, and suddenly the husband realizes his mistakes in behavior and will not continue to harass his wife with endless control, threats and quarrels. But if she only believes in miraculous healing, everything returns to normal.
Therefore, in order not to be trapped and not become a hostage of a tyrant husband, at the first manifestations of such behavior of a spouse, psychologists recommend always adhere to certain rules:
- Always be financially independent of the husband. This does not mean that a woman should look for a job with a salary greater than that of her husband. But additional work, in the case when a woman is a housewife, will never be superfluous. So that the husband does not reproach his wife with every ruble spent. Yes, and the female sex is much easier psychologically not to experience in this case, a complete dependence on the spouse.
- Do not allow yourself to be manipulated. Even if the husband is against your meetings with girlfriends or relatives that he does not like, you should not have feelings of guilt because of your communication with them. He has no right to completely forbid you to see each other.
- At the first manifestations of aggression or obvious humiliation, immediately let the husband know that this behavior will not go unpunished, and all his actions will be made public. Let him know that his wife is able to stand up for herself and will not be silent about his misdeeds.
- Release all hope that the husband will change and will again become tender and caring. Perhaps at the beginning of the relationship he was different, but now it is unlikely that everything will return.
- Take care of yourself and the happiness of children. No love can justify a degrading attitude towards a woman and her children. If a man is not able to respect you and perceive him as an equal person, then you should not grieve about him.
How to make a decision to leave the tyrant?
Home tyranny spouse quite common. Initially, a woman is a weak being and she is ready to succumb to the power of a man in order for him to protect her from all adversity and become a reliable rear. But, unfortunately, over time it happens that a woman has to defend herself from the attacks of her husband.
Representatives of the fair sex who find themselves in such a situation have to make a difficult choice, continue to live with their husband a tyrant or completely get rid of his influence and live alone. Not every woman has such a choice on the shoulder. Because it is quite difficult psychologically to get away from such a man. After all, he will in every way interfere with this, up to direct aggression.
Preparation for divorce
Getting away from a tyrant is not easy enough. But when it comes to assault, to part, you need not hesitate. In all other cases, the woman has time to think things over and get ready to break up with her husband. The main thing is not to talk ahead of time about their intentions. Otherwise, all preparation will be interrupted before it begins.
In order not to be afraid of independent living, it is important to stop being dependent on the husband psychologically and financially. It is also necessary to enlist the moral support of friends and close relatives.
- Many women from the decision to divorce keeps financial dependence on her husband. Therefore, in order to be financially independent, you will have to try pretty hard. It is even possible to find a side job and tell your spouse that you just want him to rest more.
- Find moral support. Chat with those women who have already decided to leave the tyrant's husband, their experience will be of great help now. Also enlist the support of relatives or friends. In order not to be alone with his problem. In addition, they may agree to take you home for the first time.
- Talk to a good lawyer.He will tell you how to protect yourself from a spouse in cases of threats. As well as orient how to properly divide the property and apply for child support.
How to defend against tyrant aggression?
There are cases when it is quite problematic for a girl to get away from a tyrant's husband. After all, a man and a woman in legal marriage are tied up not only by jointly acquired property and living space, but also by common children.
Therefore, many women have to learn to fight back the inappropriate behavior of her husband.
- Do not leave unpunished any manifestations of aggression and humiliation in your direction. Having shown weakness once, a woman condemns herself to constant manifestations of disrespect in her favor.
- If the husband is trying in every way to limit the communication of his wife with relatives or friends, do not give in. You are a free man, and you have the right to see them. In addition, you must always stay in touch.
- Limit children from outbreaks of aggression father. Such an unfavorable emotional situation in the family greatly affects their psychological development.
- Always keep in touch the phone numbers of the psychological assistance service and special organizations that help in difficult situations.After all, often, a woman does not want to discuss this behavior of her husband with relatives or friends. But to speak out in difficult times is sometimes vital.
It is very difficult for a person who is prone to tyranny to constantly save his face and for a long time, not to fall upon anyone. Sooner or later, these symptoms will begin to manifest. They will be expressed either in excessive jealousy, control or in aggressiveness. Even minor questions and comments are the first signs of hidden tyranny. Therefore, as soon as a woman sees them in the behavior of a man, you should immediately stop such an attitude towards yourself.